Empty Emotion: A Part-Time Literature

तिमी आयौ, मैले उत्सव मनाएँ, तिमी हाँस्यौ, हामी उत्सव मनायौँ, तिमी गयौ, मैले फेरि उत्सव मनाएँ, तर... यदि जानुनै थियो भने, तेसरि नहाँसेकी भए हुन्थ्यो।।

I try hard, Not to be Me, I whirl every wind, Trying to ape, But at the end, I end up being Me, And I believe, Like Me, You try hard, Not to be You, And swim every tide, But you end up being You, And to this quandary, I found a solution, Let Me be Me, And You be You, Let there be Balance, Let there be Peace, Let there be Happy Souls.

I am in a Quest, A Quest Intangible, And no results I Expect, And no truth that Reveals, A Quest with an Odyssey, Which runs through a Place, Where I planted my Dreams, In a disguised Desert, Full of Salty Hopes, But they welcome with a Grace, And on its way, meets the Ocean, Where those memories took the last Voyage...

कता दगुर्दै छौ ? कुन चैं तारा, तिम्रो हात बाटै फुस्किएर आकाश तिर खस्यो र ? कुन चन्द्रमा खोज्दै छौ, जस्मा तिम्ले उमंगको रंग पोतेका थियौ। एकछिन अडिएर जमिनतिर हेर त, आफ्नै सपनाहरु कुल्चिएर दगुर्दै छौ। अत्ति भयो, अब एकैछिन भुइमै बस, अनि तिम्रो टाउको बोकेर हिड्ने, यो ज्यानलाई आराम देऊ, किन हतार गर्छौ, भोली फेरि उठेर दगुर्नु छँदै छ।।

I was in a walk of life when I heard some whispers coming my way. Then I realized that a powerful day just arrived, which have the power to flip the last page of the calender hanging in the wall filled with uncounted life goals. A day that is competent enough to make everyone realize that so many years have passed yet nothing has changed. A day as ordinary as rest of the days which compels to think just for a while that so many beautiful dreams were aborted even before they were really born. Just a random day that questions the rising benchmarks of life and obligates everyone to wish one another for a wonderful and fulfilling year with a wounded soul disguised as a smiley face. #HappyNewYear2075

ए जिन्दगी, एउटा कथा सुन्छस्, ल सुन्। हिजो राति एउटा सपना देखेँ । एउटा अँध्यारो कोठाको झ्यालनिर बसिरहेको थिएँ, जसको बाहिर जुनेली रातले कब्जा गरिसकेको थियो। टाढा टाढा सम्म सन्नाटा मात्रै थियो। सुनिन्थ्यो त केवल त्यो रातको शून्यताको आवाज जून मेरा सपनाभित्रका सपनाहरु बिथोल्न काफी थियो। कालो रातलाई सिरक बनाएर ओढेको धर्तिले सायद आकाशतीर हेरेर टोलाइरहेको थियो, मैले जस्तै। हामी दुबै त्यो जुनैजुनले ढाकेको आकाश हेर्दै टोलाउन थाल्यौँ। हेर्दा हेर्दै त्यो आकाशको निलोपनमा हराउन थालेँ। हराउँदै गर्दा मनका भित्ताहरूमा विचारका आँधिहरूले हिर्काउन थाले। मलाई समुन्द्र सबै भन्दा गहीरो लाग्थ्यो, तर यो आकाश त समुन्द्र भन्दा पनि गहीरो रहेछ। तेत्रा ताराहरु डुबाउन सक्ने आकाश, जुन अनि सूर्य पनी डुबाउन सक्ने आकाश। यो सबै ब्रम्हाण्ड डुबाउन सक्ने आकाश। साँच्चै कति गहीरो रहेछ आकाश, कहिले हेरेरै नसकिने, टाढा टाढा सम्म नीलो, सबै भन्दा गहीरो। तर तँलाई एउटा कुरा था छ? तँ त आकाश भन्दा पनी गहीरो रैछस्। यति गहीरो कि कहिले डुबेरै नसकिने। यति गहीरो कि तँ भित्र बोलिएका आवाजहरुको प्रतिध्वनि सम्म सुन्न नसकिने। यति गहीर...

Sometimes, I travel in time, Sometimes in the space, Miles away in a distant street, Full of the stars' treat, To find something, That redeems the journey, To hunt my own dreams, I built over times, May be they will try to hide, May be I will never find, But I will keep flying, High, Up with the wind, Far from my existence, Not near my emotions, That try to abandon me, Just to reach the destiny, That keeps my secret, Away from my soul.

एउटा समय थियो, जतिबेला मलाई तिम्रो, परिभाषा थाहा थिएन, तिमी बिना अनुमति आँउथ्यौ, मेरो सपनाभरी रमाउँथ्यौ, अनि केहि नबोली सुटुक्क जान्थ्यौ, तर तिमीले कहिले ख्याल गरेनौ, तिम...

This was the year that really had an impact in my living. Life has shown me the most extreme yet different edges of the meanings I was searching. While hunting for the destiny, I have experienced most joy and the most frustration within a single bit of time. I have felt both empty and overloaded with emotions at the same time. I cried alone in a corner and laughed in the other one. Somewhere between the tears and laughter, I realised that there is always a wider meaning to everything and the room is always bigger than it seems and of course, the life itself is larger than it appears. When life has a beautiful face of a friend, it equally has an evil face of an enemy. And the enemy lies within yourself. One of the purpose of life is to defeat the enemy within and discover more of the friend and to treat yourself with all the feast of happiness.  #Farewell2017 #Welcome2018

Somewhere in a Dream I was flying, To beat the clouds I was trying, Beyond cosmos reached a little far, Above which was a shining Star, Glittering with a beautiful smile, Deserved to adore for a while, In all of the space we were alone, The odyssey smiled which we owned, Together in the universe we flew, The curse was near I never knew, When the night was killed by dawn, This heart started to weep and yearn, My eyes were damp when I realized, The dream was a beatitude in disguise, And it was just an illusion of life, That will never be materialized.